Momentary Panics

These are moments in which your whole world comes crashing down for a split second before you realise just how much of an idiot you actually are. If they say heart attacks take years off your life - then these panics must shorten your lifetime by about an hour each time, probably. Just in case you are not with me and about to click away from the post because you think it's finally happened, and I have finally gone insane, I will give you some examples.

I was just casually drinking some hot chocolate, because I was cold and had no food of which to comfort eat. When I was casually drinking this, I missed my mouth, totally, and poured hot chocolate down my scarf and onto my arm, cue momentary panic that somehow, this hot chocolate would STAIN MY ARM. As in, it would never come off my arm, because the only way you get rid of stains is in a washing machine, and i can't put my arm in washing machine - it DOESN'T WORK.

Other examples of momentary panic:

- When you misjudge the last step of a flight of stairs and for a moment, you are hurtling towards a terrifying death as your foot falls an inch further than expected.

- When you're desperately looking for your phone / iPod / kitten, expecting the worst, almost in tears as your desperation turns to savagery and you search through your bag, only to realise that it is in fact in your hand.

- When you're sitting on a train, very tired after a long day of playing cards and drinking dr pepper, and there's the panic when you realise you have been daydreaming and for a second you truly believe that you have missed your stop and you are somewhere in Norway even though it's technically impossible BECAUSE YOU LIVE ON AN ISLAND.

- When you're watching DIY SOS and there's the tense moment when you don't know if they are tears of joy or distress.

This has all happened to me. Don't judge.

:)